The day came and unfortunately that morning, the missus woke up with a severe case of gastroenteritis or ‘winter sickness’ as it used to be called. So I attempted to call Barclays to re-arrange my appointment.

The operative word here is attempt’. I was instantly involved in a telephone answer system that assumed that I would know my telephone banking pin number and when I didn’t have it to hand, as I only wanted to speak to my branch, I was put into a cycle of sales statements about Barclays products and crappy lift music (this took an age) I was then transferred to an Indian gentleman who politely asked me for my online banking pin number…. which I still didn’t have.

After a series of security questions (important I suppose) I was informed that the system was temporarily not working and that I would have to ring back.

‘I only want to speak to my branch’ I said slightly aspirated. ‘ I need to move an appointment’

‘Sorry Sir, but I must apologies, our system is not working at this time, can you please call back later’

So I did… three time, having to go through the same security rigmarole and lift music.

Why can’t I just pick up the phone and speak to someone in my branch? it is absolutely ridiculous.

I missed my appointment in the end and I still haven’t got through to the branch.

Now the real kicker…

I found a telephone number for Barclays that lest you speak to any branch. 0845 877 0057

When you ring this number a polite voice asks you to say the town that your branch is in and voila! you are magically transferred directly to your local branch. Great…

Except I have been trying all morning and no one is answering. Fantastic.